Please Take A Moment To Vote In the Current Super Bowl Poll... Thank You.

People Come Up With the Craziest Searches Part II: The Naked Truth

In the latest installment of "People Come Up With the Craziest Searches", I thought I would share some of the strange keyword combos that have led people to my blog over the past couple of months. Because I obviously remember the posts I have written, most of these keywords make perfect sense. Still, I am amazed at the number of people searching for nude pics of 60s sex kitten Joey Heatherton.

1. stevie nicks on stage topless
2. joey heatherton totally naked
3. FLORENCE LARUE NUDE
4. does lil richard have a boyfriend
5. MARY J BLIGE GROWING PAINS THIGH BOOTS
6. breakfast club trivia car andrew is dropped off in
7. sugar gay hustler movie "closing credits"
8. the afro is retro
9. thailand insane laverne and shirley
10. picket fences cow baby
11. "hey love" "no my brother"
12. "and my diet pill is wearing off"
13. karate Kid - Sweep the leg clip
14. joey heatherton nude pictures
15. joey heatherton naked

What are some of the craziest keyword searches that people have used to find your blog lately?

Thursday Thirteen #30: Stars Dish About Other Stars

Thirteen Celebrity Quotes

When celebs dish on other celebs, what comes out of their mouths is often funnier than anything a screenwriter could come up with. Below are some quotes extracted from the hilarious 1994 book "Hollywood Babble On" by Boze Hadleigh.


1. Rock Hudson let his gay agent marry him off to his secretary because he didn't want people to get the right idea- Anthony Perkins

2. She's the original good time that was had by all- Bette Davis on starlet Marilyn Monroe

3. All my life I wanted to look like Liz Taylor. Now I find that Liz Taylor is beginning to look like me. - Divine, who weighed more than 300 pounds.

4. Michael Jackson cut off his nose to spite his race- Marvin Gaye

5. I was particularly stunned by the casting of [Tom] Cruise, who is no more my Vampire Lestat than Edward G. Robinson is Rhett Butler. - Anne Rice on the filming of her novel Interview With A Vampire

6. Bill (William Frawley) took a dislike to Viv when he overheard her say that she was too young to play his wife. Or, more precisely, that he was too old to play her husband. - Lucille Ball

7. Audrey Hepburn is the patron saint of anorexics.- Orson Welles

8. He looks like a dwarf that fell in a vat of pubic hair.- Boy George on Prince

9. Sly Stallone is five-seven, I believe. Shorter than you'd think -not just short on talent. Anyway, he only hires actors his height or shorter, unless they're to play some kind of freakish villain. So I'll never work with Stallone unless I let him shoot me, and I'll never let myself get that desperate!- Burt Lancaster

10. Peter O'Toole looks like he's walking around just to save funeral expenses.- John Huston

11. A toupee'-wearing hack has-been. - Bobcat Goldthwaite on Charlton Heston

12. Liberace and Truman Capote- I can never get those two straight. - Milton Berle

13. Diana Ross doesn't want to do this movie because she wants to be white. - Ryan O'Neal about The Bodyguard, an interracial love story finally filmed in 1992 with Whitney Houston and Kevin Costner.

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Mario Van Peebles Joins the Cast of All My Children

In a casting move that has me very intrigued, actor/writer/director Mario Van Peebles (New Jack City, Posse, Ali, etc.) is joining the ABC soap All My Children. Peebles has been cast as Samuel Woods, a U.S. District Attorney who runs for the Senate. As part of his bid to get elected, Woods appears on the Oprah-styled show "New Beginnings" hosted by Erica Kane (played by soap icon Susan Lucci). According to reports, sparks will fly between Woods and Kane which could lead to a possible romance.

Despite some of the comments I've read on ABC.com's message board, I feel that involving the vivacious Erica Kane in an interracial relationship would be an interesting proposition. At the very least, the rumored pairing of Erica and Samuel will shake things up in Pine Valley. Peebles makes his All My Children debut on Tuesday January 29th.

Final Results of the Batman Villain Poll

In a tight race, the character referred to as the Clown Prince of Crime, the Harlequin of Hate, and the Ace of Knaves emerged victorious in the recent "Favorite Batman Villain" poll. Since first place was knotted up between The Joker and Catwoman when the poll closed, I reopened it and broke the tie. I can't speak for the rest of you who voted for The Joker but for me, it was the combination of the portrayals by Cesar Romero and Jack Nicholson that won me over.

Although I didn't expect Mr. Freeze to win, I thought that he would get more than the one vote. Oh well, to paraphrase a quote uttered by George Sanders when he portrayed Mr. Freeze in the 1960s TV series, "that's the way the ice cube crumbles".

Here are the final results:

The Joker- 43%
Catwoman- 36%
The Penguin- 10%
The Riddler- 6%
Mr. Freeze- 3%

Below are clips of the winning Batman villain in various incarnations:

Spin City Playlist For 1/26/08

4 pm hour

Boogie Wonderland- Earth, Wind & Fire w/ The Emotions
The Kid Is Hot Tonight- Loverboy
Hard Luck Woman- Kiss
Let It Whip- The Dazz Band
Don't Stand Another Chance- Janet Jackson
Original Sin- INXS
Fooled Around and Fell In Love- Elvin Bishop

Double Retro segment's feat. artist: Curtis Mayfield
We're A Winner- (rec. w/ The Impressions in 1967)
She Don't Let Nobody (But Me)- (rec. solo in 1981)

Call Me- Blondie
Glory, Glory- The Rascals
Misdemeanor- Foster Sylvers
Higher Ground- Stevie Wonder
24 Hour Party People- Happy Mondays

5 pm hour

Church of the Poison Mind- Culture Club
Do You Wanna Get Away- Shannon
She's Gone- Tavares
Fox On the Run- Sweet
Apache- The Sugarhill Gang
Meeting In the Ladies Room- Klymaxx

The Guilty Pleasure of the Week:
Macho Man- The Village People

New Song- Howard Jones
He's So Dull- Vanity 6
You Oughta Be With Me- Al Green
Gone Movin' On- The Raiders
Breakdown- Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers
Party Train- The Gap Band
Slow Down- Loose Ends

6 pm hour

Cold Hearted- Paula Abdul
The Ghost In You- Psychedelic Furs
You Made Me Believe In Magic- The Bay City Rollers
The Payback- James Brown
Let's Start II Dance Again- Bohannon
Get It On (Bang A Gong)- The Power Station
Wouldn't It Be Good- Nik Kershaw
I've Got To Use My Imagination- Gladys Knight & the Pips
Where Are All My Friends- Harold Melvin & the Blue Notes
I Gotta Try- Michael McDonald
Right On Track- The Breakfast Club
Bless You- Martha Reeves & the Vandellas
Gangsters of the Groove- Heatwave
Back In Black- AC/DC

Did any of your faves make this week's playlist?

Spin City videos:

ESPN's Dana Jacobson Suspended Over Roast Remarks

photo courtesy of SI.com

Earlier this week, ESPN's Dana Jacobson (the co-host of the morning sports talk program "ESPN First Take") was suspended by the network for one week because of remarks she made at a January 11th roast for fellow ESPN personalities Mike Greenberg and Mike Golic (the hosts of "Mike and Mike In the Morning"). The suspension comes on the heels of criticism Jacobson received by several Catholic advocacy groups. According to reports, an inebriated Jacobson appeared on stage at the non-televised event drinking from a bottle of Belvedere Vodka and said "Fuck Notre Dame," "Fuck Touchdown Jesus," and "Fuck Jesus". Over the years, Jacobson (a University of Michigan alum) and Golic (a former footballer for Notre Dame) have exchanged digs about the rivalry between the two schools. According to The Press of Atlantic City, Greenberg and Golic rested their heads in their hands in embarrassment and comedian Eddie Griffin came to the podium to defend Jacobson after she was booed by the crowd. Although there reportedly is footage of the incident, it has yet to surface. Maybe the budding Spielberg is holding onto the footage until they get some money or possibly ESPN has the videotaped evidence and is squashing it... who knows?

After she received her enforced "vacation", Jacobson released the following statement:

"I am very sorry. My remarks about Notre Dame were foolish and insensitive. I respect all religions and did not mean anything derogatory by my poorly chosen words. I also deeply regret the embarrassment I have caused ESPN and Mike and Mike. My actions at the roast were inappropriate and in no way represent who I really am. I have personally apologized to many of the people involved. I won't make excuses for my behavior but do hope that I can be forgiven for such a poor lack of judgment."

The Dana Jacobson incident comes less than a month after Kelly Tilghman was suspended by The Golf Channel for her remark that younger players should "lynch him in a back alley" in reference to Tiger Woods. In my opinion, the Jacobson controversy is slightly different. Her drunken comments, though ill-advised and not clever, were made at a roast and the point of these events is to hurl insults at the guest(s) of honor. As many of you know, the language at a roast can often be foul and vulgar.

I'm not saying that those who are offended by Jacobson's remarks about Jesus shouldn't be. Although her comments didn't offend me, that doesn't mean that others should feel the same way. However, I do wonder if the suspension of Dana Jacobson is an overreaction. What do you think?

Please Take A Moment To Vote In the Current "Batman Villain" Poll... Thank You.

Heath Ledger Found Dead At the Age of 28

Oscar-nominated actor Heath Ledger, star of such films as "Brokeback Mountain", "10 Things I Hate About You", and "A Knight's Tale" was found dead in his New York apartment Tuesday afternoon. He was only 28 years old. According to reports, Ledger's body was found shortly after 3:30pm by his housekeeper and masseuse, who entered the bedroom to find him unconscious in bed, surrounded by pills. A spokeswoman for the medical examiner's office said that an autopsy is planned for Wednesday.

Ledger's untimely death comes exactly one week after the demise of fellow actor Brad Renfro. Because of Renfro's well-publicized bouts with substance abuse, his death wasn't a total surprise to me. However, the loss of Heath Ledger has me truly shocked. It is reminiscent of the tragic death of River Phoenix back in 1993. It's weird because I had just referenced Ledger earlier this morning in the comments section of my post in which I asked readers to vote in the "Favorite Batman Villain" poll. Because a fellow blogger (DoubleDeckerBusGuy) voted for The Joker in the poll, I responded by saying that I was interested in seeing how Ledger would handle the role in the upcoming Batman installment titled "The Dark Knight" (scheduled to be released in the U.S. on July 18th, 2008). Ledger leaves behind his 2 yr old daughter Matilda Rose (the child he had with "Brokeback Mountain" co-star and ex-fiance' Michelle Williams).

Below are clips from Heath Ledger's too short career:

Final Results of the Marvin/Tammi Poll

Handily beating the competition without ever looking back, the 1967 single "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" was voted as the favorite duet between Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell. Many voters mentioned how difficult it was to make a selection. This is totally understandable because I don't think there was a weak song in the bunch. Out of the 5 choices, I would go with "You're All I Need To Get By"... or maybe "Ain't No Mountain High Enough... or possibly "If I Could Build My Whole World Around You"... no wait...

Ironically, out of the 5 song choices in the poll, "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" was the least successful one on the Billboard Pop Singles chart (peaking at #19). However, it reached #3 on the R&B chart. In addition to Marvin & Tammi's version being an excellent tune, I feel that the song's optimism has helped it grow in popularity since it's release. Over the years, it has become a go-to song for movie producers looking to enhance a "feel-good" scene (it's been featured in such films as "Stepmom" and "Remember the Titans").

One thing that surprised me about the poll is that "If I Could Build My Whole World Around You" received no votes. A big hit in its day (#10 pop, #2 R&B), it probably receives the least amount of airplay today out of the 5 song selections. Still, I thought it would get some voter love.

Here are the final results:

Ain't No Mountain High Enough- 41%
Ain't Nothing Like the Real Thing- 25%
You're All I Need To Get By and Your Precious Love- 16% each
If I Could Build My Whole World Around You- 0%

Here is a clip of Marvin & Tammi performing the winning song:

Spin City Playlist For 1/19/08

4 pm hour

Born In the U.S.A.- Bruce Springsteen
Heaven On the 7th Floor- The Mighty Pope
Heavy Makes You Happy (Sha-Na-Boom Boom)- The Staple Singers
Don't Lose My Number- Phil Collins
Bring the Noise- Public Enemy
Sister Fate- Sheila E.
Dancing In the Moonlight- King Harvest

Common Thread segment: 67th birthday anniv. tribute to David Ruffin
Rode By the Place (Where We Used To Stay)
I Couldn't Believe It (David Ruffin & Eddie Kendricks)
Just Let Me Hold You For A Night
Standing On the Top (The Temptations)

S.O.S.- ABBA
Bustin' Out- Rick James
More Than This- Roxy Music

5 pm hour

She Bop- Cyndi Lauper
Stool Pigeon- Kid Creole & the Coconuts
What Can I Do For You- Labelle
Got To Give It Up- Marvin Gaye
Everything Counts- Depeche Mode
Freaks Come Out At Night- Whodini
Bad Girls- Donna Summer

Double Retro segment's feat. artist: The Bee Gees
Spicks and Specks (1966)
You Win Again (1987)

Jungle Boogie- Kool and the Gang
Neighbors- The Rolling Stones
Like the Weather- 10,000 Maniacs
Tenderness- General Public
Back Together Again- Roberta Flack w/ Donny Hathaway

6 pm hour

Reelin' In the Years- Steely Dan
Fancy Dancer- The Commodores
Ronnie Talk To Russia- Prince
The Warrior- Scandal feat. Patty Smyth
Only Love Can Break Your Heart- Neil Young
Albert Flasher- The Guess Who
Walk the Dinosaur- Was (Not Was)
I Need Your Lovin'- Teena Marie

#1 segment:
Rock With You- Michael Jackson: song was #1 on both the pop (4 wks) and R&B (6 wks) charts this week in 1980

Dance the Kung Fu- Carl Douglas
Are You Ready- Pacific Gas & Electric
Just Like Heaven- The Cure
The Metro- Berlin
Could It Be I'm Falling In Love- The Spinners

Did any of your faves make this week's playlist?

Spin City videos:

Retro PSA: This Is Your Brain On Drugs

Because destruction can be an attention grabber, I am featuring the memorable "This Is Your Brain On Drugs" public service announcement from 1998. Starring actress Rachel Leigh Cook (She's All That and Josie & the Pussycats), the PSA was selected by TV Guide as one of the 100 greatest television advertisements ever. For those who had plans to go all Trainspotting and ride the "white horse", I hope that the sight of Rachel Leigh using a skillet on a dairy product and various kitchen items to point out the dangers of heroin made an impression. The only problem is that after watching the commercial just now, I have a jones for an omelette... but I am out of eggs! Damn it!

TCM Airs the Cult Classic Barbarella

As part of its "TCM Underground" series, the classic movie channel will air the Jane Fonda film "Barbarella" late Friday/early Saturday at 2 am EST. Released in 1968, the futuristic comedy-adventure revolves around a young heroine (Fonda) out to stop the villainous Dr. Durand Durand (whose name inspired those "Hungry Like the Wolf" boys). Along the way, Barbarella encounters strange beings and has some mind-blowing adventures; all the while doing so in various stages of undress... yeah baby!

When I first saw "Barbarella" on Cinemax as a teen during the 80s, it left quite an impression. Even though it's been years since I've seen it, I still remember Jane Fonda's striptease in zero gravity during the opening credits, John Phillip Law as the blind angel Pygar, and the sex scene that involves taking a pill/touching hands.

"Barbarella" is definitely a product of its time... which to me is a good thing since I love most things associated with the 60s. For more details and background information on "Barbarella", you can visit TCM's website by clicking here. Below is the trailer for the film.

Thursday Thirteen #28: Some of My Favorite TV Show Openings

Thirteen of my favorite TV show openings
A good opening title sequence can really set the tone for the show. If done right, they can sometimes get you to stick around for the rest of the show. Below are 13 of my favorite openings. Because of space and clip availability, there are a few that I wasn't able to include (such as The Simpsons and the Apollo Theater-styled opening for The Cosby Show).

1. The Avengers- Stylish and very 60s. The affection that John Steed and Emma Peel felt for each other really comes through.

2. Blossom- The two words I think of when I watch this opening are fun and energy. Plus, it features a bouncy theme song by Dr. John!

3. Everybody Loves Raymond- This hilarious sequence is from one of the earlier seasons and features Ray & Debra doing their damnedest to keep Frank, Marie, and Robert from coming over.

4. Fat Albert- A mix of live-action and animation with a funky theme song, this is probably my favorite opening of any Saturday morning cartoon series.

5. Freaks and Geeks- One of the dreaded school traditions (the yearbook photo session) set to the music of Joan Jett and the Blackhearts.

6. The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air- A throwback in that the opening sequence and theme song set up the show's premise. It even uses the actress who played Will Smith's mom in some of the early DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince videos.

7. Get Smart- One of the most original opening sequences ever, it makes going to work seem fun.

8. Laverne & Shirley- The Lucy and Ethel of the 1970s in all their glory.

9. Magnum P.I.- Just like the show itself, the opening is a mix of action and tongue-in-cheek humor.

10. Martin- I almost went with the opening from the later years that had an animated Martin climbing out of the TV and interacting with the other cast members. However, I decided to go with the original opening sequence because it's funnier and has the better theme song.

11. The Monkees- This is the opening (from the 2nd and final season) that is most familiar to people today. When The Monkees is rerun, the 1st season opening sequence is only used for one episode. Although the 1st season sequence was good, the one for the 2nd season is livelier and more creative.

12. The Nanny- Just like the show itself, the opening title sequence is a throwback to sitcoms from the 50s and 60s. Not only does the theme song spell out the show's premise, but the opening features the cast in animated form.

13. What's Happening!!- Raj, Rerun, and Dwayne hanging out and having fun to the sounds of the one and only Henry Mancini.

Below are the 13 opening credit sequences. I hope they bring back fond memories for you. If you have any favorite TV show openings, feel free to share them with us in the comments section.




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Spike Lee's "She's Gotta Have It" Is Finally On DVD!

Tuesday January 15th marks the North American DVD release of Spike Lee's debut feature film, the 1986 romantic comedy-drama "She's Gotta Have It". Although it was released in the U.K. in 2006, this will be the first time that it will be available on DVD in North America.

Starring Tracy Camilla Johns, Tommy Redmond Hicks, John Canada Terrell, and Spike Lee (who in addition to directing the film, also wrote and co-produced it), "She's Gotta Have It" tells the story of Nola Darling (played by Johns). An desirable and independent female, Nola simultaneously dates three men (played by Hicks, Terrell, and Lee) who share little in common... except that they all want Ms. Darling to dump the other two and make a commitment to them.

Shot mostly in black and white on a limited budget, "She's Gotta Have It" is arguably one of the most important films of the last 25 years. It helped to usher in not only a new wave of African American cinema, but independent filmmaking as well. The success of "She's Gotta Have It" opened the doors for such talents as John Singleton, Albert and Allen Hughes, Julie Dash, and Kevin Smith. The popularity of the film (in particular Spike Lee's "Mars Blackmon" character) also led to a series of Nike ads featuring Spike and Michael Jordan.

Since I was unable to find any clips from "She's Gotta Have It" that I could embed in this post, I have included some quotes from the film below.

Dog #7: Baby, you're so fine, I'd drink a tub of your bath water.

Mars Blackmon: [begging Nola not to dump him] Please baby, pleasebaby, please baby, baby baby please!

---

Nola Darling: It's really about control, my body, my mind. Who was going to own it? Them? Or me? I'm not a one-man woman. Bottom line.

---

Mars Blackmon (to Jamie): Nola's about as dependable as a ripped diaphragm.

Please Take A Moment To Vote In the Current Marvin & Tammi Poll... Thank You.

Final Results Of Cross Dressing Comedy Poll

Proving that well-done transvestism can stand the test of time, the 1959 movie "Some Like It Hot" received the most votes in the recent favorite cross-dressing comedy poll. I finally got around to seeing this about 5-10 years ago and thought that it more than lived up to its hype. If you haven't seen it but have TCM, you should keep a look out because they air it on a semi-regular basis.

Jumping out to an early lead, but falling just a little short was the Robin Williams-Sally Field comedy "Mrs. Doubtfire". One thing that made me laugh were the remarks in the comments section by "She" regarding the repulsiveness of not only the character Mrs. Doubtfire, but Robin Williams himself.

Coming in 3rd place was the Oscar-winning 1982 movie "Tootsie". Had I voted, this is the film I would have selected. I remember reading in the paper years ago that Dustin Hoffman had plans to make a comedy where he would dress as a woman. I thought that it was an iffy idea at best; man was I wrong! I felt that it worked on two levels: as a cross-dressing comedy and a soap opera spoof. Plus, I liked the theme of Michael Dorsey (Hoffman) dressing as a woman and becoming a better man as a result.

Since I hate to see an entry get shut out, I was pleased to see that the Martin Lawrence film "Big Momma's House" finally received a vote near the end of the polling.

Here are the final results:

Some Like It Hot- 41%
Mrs. Doubtfire- 33%
Tootsie- 20%
Big Momma's House- 4%

Below is the trailer to "Some Like It Hot"

Darnell Williams and Debbi Morgan Returning To All My Children

Starting on Friday January 18th, the story of one of All My Children's most popular duos (as well as soap's first African American supercouple) continues. That's the day that Dr. Angie Hubbard (played by Debbi Morgan) returns to Pine Valley to assist on a case at the local hospital. Darnell Williams' return as Jesse Hubbard takes place on January 25th.

When I first started watching AMC back in the mid 80s, Jesse and Angie were two of my favorite characters on the show. Not only did Jesse's streetwise demeanor mesh well with Angie's sweet disposition, but it was refreshing to see a romantic relationship between two black characters portrayed in a positive manner.

Amazingly, an article on the official All My Children website suggests that Angie will be reunited with a living Jesse. What makes this potential reunion amazing is that in 1988, Jesse was shot and killed in the line of duty while serving on the Pine Valley police force. Not only did Jesse die, but the death took place onscreen. If his character is brought back from the dead, it will be very interesting to see how the scribes for AMC accomplish this task.

To get you primed for the return of Jesse and Angie, Soapnet has scheduled 3 classic All My Children episodes spotlighting the duo on Sunday January 13th starting at 2 pm EST. This mini-marathon is followed by the 30 minute special "Back In Pine Valley", which takes a look at their return. The special also features fan fave Rebecca Budig, who will be returning to "All My Children" in the role of Greenlee Smythe on January 16th.

For a timeline of Jesse and Angie's history, click here.

Please Take A Moment To Vote In the Current Favorite Cross-dressing Comedy Poll... Thank You.

Retro Commercial: Listerine

Since his latest movie "The Bucket List" is scheduled to open in wide release on January 11th, I thought that I would go into the Morgan Freeman archives and dust off this 1973 commercial for Listerine. According to Morgan the telephone repairman, he uses Listerine because he hates it. Given the fact that as Principal Joe Clark, Morgan got up in their grill on many occasions, I am sure that some of his castmates in the film "Lean On Me" were hoping that he still used Listerine. When Morgan says in the commercial that Listerine kills germs, I couldn't help but think about when he (as Joe Clark) lectured one of his students on the dangers of smoking crack ("It kills your brain cells son! It kills your brain cells!")

Golf Channel Anchor Suspended Over Comments About Tiger Woods

On Wednesday, the Golf Channel suspended anchor Kelly Tilghman for 2 weeks over comments she made about Tiger Woods on the air last Friday. During the Mercedes-Benz Championship, Tilghman was discussing young players who could challenge Tiger Woods with her broadcasting partner Nick Faldo, who suggested that "to take Tiger on, maybe they should just gang up for a while." Tilghman jokingly replied, "Lynch him in a back alley".

When this news story first broke earlier in the week, the Golf Channel stated that no disciplinary action was planned. However, they changed their tune once the story started to gather steam (including the intervention of the Rev. Al Sharpton, who demanded that Tilghman be fired immediately). When the Golf Channel first announced their plans to do nothing, I was disappointed. Although I didn't think that Tilghman should be fired, I felt that a suspension would be sufficient. Joking or not, what Tilghman said was offensive and irresponsible.

Should the Golf Channel had done nothing as originally planned? Is the two week suspension sufficient? Should Tilghman be fired for her comments? I am interested to hear your thoughts.
For more on Tilghman's suspension, click here.

Below is a clip of the incident that started the controversy.

Thursday Thirteen #27: Jack Nicholson Movie Quotes

Thirteen Jack Nicholson Movie Quotes

Since Jack's latest film "The Bucket List" (co-starring Morgan Freeman) is going into wide release on January 11th, I thought I would list some classic quotes from some of his earlier movies. Because I haven't posted any trivia in awhile, I decided to just provide the quotes and see if you can name the movies. Some are fairly easy, others not so. If you don't want to play along, but want to list some of your favorite Nicholson movies/quotes instead, you can do that too. Feel free to check back on Friday, because I will provide the answers in the comments section. Have fun!

1. [Drinking his Jim Beam] Here's the first of the day, fellas! To old D.H. Lawrence.
[He starts flapping one arm like a chicken]
Neh! Neh! Neh! Fuh! Fuh! Fuh! Indians.

2. I am the motherfucking shore patrol, motherfucker! I am the motherfucking shore patrol! Give this man a beer.

3. I run my unit how I run my unit. You want to investigate me, roll the dice and take your chances. I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 Cubans who are trained to kill me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge, and make me nervous.

4. I see men, sixty, seventy years old breaking their balls to stay fit! What for? When I die, I want to be sick, not healthy.

5. If you wanted to get me on my back, all you had to do was ask me.

6. Little pigs, little pigs, let me come in. Not by the hair of your chiny-chin-chin? Well then I'll huff and I'll puff, and I'll blow your house in.

7. Relatively soon, I will die. Maybe in 20 years, maybe tomorrow, it doesn't matter. Once I am dead and everyone who knew me dies too, it will be as though I never existed. What difference has my life made to anyone. None that I can think of. None at all.

8. Temper's the one thing you can't get rid of, by losing it.

9. They was giving me ten thousand watts a day, you know, and I'm hot to trot! The next woman takes me on's gonna light up like a pinball machine and pay off in silver dollars!

10. Loach: What happened to your nose, Gittes? Somebody slammed a bedroom window on it?
Jake Gittes: (Jack Nicholson): Nope. Your wife got excited. She crossed her legs a little too quick. You understand what I mean, pal?

11. Where do they teach you to talk like this? In some Panama City "Sailor wanna hump-hump" bar, or is it getaway day and your last shot at his whiskey? Sell crazy someplace else, we're all stocked up here.

12. Where does he get those wonderful toys?

13. You want a job? I got a job for you. Fix up this pigsty! You get a pretty Goddammed good salary for testing out this bed all day! You want an extra fifty dollars a week, try vacuuming! You want an extra hundred, make this Goddammed bed! Try opening some Goddammed windows! That's why you can't stand up in here, the Goddammed place smells like a coffin!

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TV Memories: It Takes A Thief

Since January 9th marks the 40th anniversary of its debut, I thought I would write about a series that sadly doesn't get a lot of play these days... "It Takes A Thief". Originally airing on ABC from 1968-1970, the show starred Robert Wagner as Alexander Mundy, a suave thief who made the worst mistake one could make in his profession... he got caught. While serving a prison sentence, he was contacted by a U.S. spy agency who offered to spring him if he would use his talents to steal for the government. This led to Mundy's famous line (heard in the opening credits), "Let me get this straight. You want me to steal?" While working for the government, Mundy got to travel the world and romance scores of beautiful women. As you can guess, the government didn't have to do a lot of arm twisting to convince Mundy to take the gig.

I discovered "It Takes A Thief" during the 1970s when I would watch reruns of it with my mother. Because it had been so long since I had seen the series, I was very happy when TV Land added it to their lineup in the late 90s. Featuring breezy plots, snappy dialogue, exotic locations, and the always smooth Robert Wagner, "It Takes A Thief" was one of the best action-adventure series from the 1960s.

I have read that there are plans for Will Smith to star in a feature film remake of "It Takes A Thief". Hopefully, this will drum up interest in the original version (which currently isn't available on DVD). I just hope that it's not as bad as I heard Will Smith's other remake of a 60s TV classic (The Wild, Wild West) was.

Below is the opening credit sequence from the 3rd and final season of "It Takes A Thief", along with clips from the series. Some of the guest stars include Fred Astaire (who played Alexander's father Alistair Mundy in the 3rd season), Bill Bixby, The Fifth Dimension, and Susan St. James.

Final Results of the TV Show On DVD Poll

Making a late surge (or should I say Serge), the Bronson Pinchot/Mark Linn-Baker sitcom "Perfect Strangers" received the most votes in the recent poll in which I asked what TV show are you most anticipating coming to DVD this year. Since there haven't been any announcements yet of any huge TV shows ala "Seinfeld" or "Lost" coming to DVD for the first time this year, the poll voting was relatively close.

Coming in 2nd place was the Saturday night staple "The Love Boat" (Season 1, Volume 1 is scheduled to hit shelves on March 4th). Due to its heavy use of famous guest stars and because "The Love Boat" isn't a show that you necessarily have to watch in chronological order, I thought that CBS Home Entertainment might take the "Best of" approach and package episodes based around a particular theme. Who knows, maybe they will take this route somewhere down the line.

Bringing up the rear in voting was "The Price Is Right", which didn't surprise me all that much. Although the Game Show Network has proved that there is an audience for these reruns, buying them on DVD is another matter.

Here are the final results:

Perfect Strangers- 27%
The Love Boat- 22%
The Equalizer/The New Adv. of Old Christine- 16% each
The Smurfs- 11%
The Price Is Right-5%

Below are clips/montages from "Perfect Strangers", including a scene featuring Harriette and Carl Winslow before their characters were spun off onto "Family Matters". Because I hadn't seen "Perfect Strangers" in awhile, watching these clips reminded that Larry and Balki made a pretty good comic duo.

Anniversary of Wheel of Fortune Debut

January 6 marks the 33rd anniversary of the debut of "Wheel of Fortune". Premiering as part of NBC's daytime lineup back in 1975, the show originally featured Chuck Woolery as host and Susan Stafford as the letter turner. Due to a salary dispute, Chuck left in 1981 and was replaced by Pat Sajak (Vanna White took over for Susan a year later). Pat and Vanna have been the only host/hostess combo on the syndicated nighttime version (which began in 1983). When Pat left the daytime version in his bid to replace Johnny as the King of Late Night TV, he was succeeded by former NFL kicker Rolf Benirschke (1989) and Bob Goen (1989-1991).

One of the appeals of "Wheel of Fortune" is that you don't have to be a genius to play along. We all have sat at home and said to ourselves or out loud something like, "I can't believe that moron still doesn't know the puzzle! Why are they buying a vowel?!"

The producers of the show have also done a good job of keeping things fresh by making changes over the years. I think one of their smartest moves was switching to the play-for-cash format in 1987. Up until then, the winner of a round would use their cash winnings to shop for prizes that were displayed in the studio. Not only did the "shopping round" slow things down, but some of that shit looked like it came from Ralph Furley's apartment.

Although I don't watch "Wheel" as much as I used to, I still catch it on occasion. Both Pat (now 61) and Vanna (she'll be 51 in February) have held up nicely. It's not fair, but I have a feeling that if Vanna doesn't quit, she'll eventually be eased out in favor of a "fresh face". Don't shoot the messenger: we all know that hostesses have a shorter shelf life than their male counterparts... just ask an ex-Barker's Beauty. Don't shed too many tears for Vanna if she is shown the door. She's had a helluva run turning/touching letters for a living.

Below are clips from "Wheel of Fortune" over the years, including one from the Chuck and Susan era. As I said earlier, you don't have to be a genius to play "Wheel of Fortune". However, (as you will see from the 2nd clip), you do need to know how to spell.

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For DVD release date information, please click here.

Chris Bosh Wants Your Vote

Toronto Raptors power forward Chris Bosh is the man behind one of the funniest things to hit the NBA in awhile. In late December, he starred in a campaign video urging fans to vote for him in the upcoming NBA All-Star game. I saw it for the first time the other day and thought it was very funny (I still do). The video is a spoof of those cheesy used car commercials and shows a side of Bosh that I and most other fans don't get a chance to see.

Like I said, the video is funny to me. However, I also originally thought that the video would affect the integrity of the All-Star voting process. I quickly had to check myself though. Integrity?! Integrity?! In the past, fans have voted in players such as Yao Ming and Shaquille O'Neal in years when their stats didn't warrant it. When you consider that, you realize that the voting process has about as much integrity as a certain U.S. Presidential election. Oops, did I say that out loud? Besides, Bosh has pretty good numbers for the season (20.3 pts, 9.2 rebounds, 2.2 assists), so it's not like he's a scrub off the bench stumping for votes.

As of Thursday, Bosh was the 3rd leading vote getter (411,313) for forwards in the Eastern Conference. The 2008 NBA All-Star Game will be played in New Orleans on February 17.

TCM Star of the Month For January: James Cagney

Mae Clarke gets a grapefruit facial from Cagney in a scene from Public Enemy

Starting tonight and continuing every Wednesday night for the remainder of January, TCM will air films featuring the star of the month... James Cagney. He ranks near the top of my list of all-time favorite performers. When most people think of Cagney, they see the snarling gangster. However, he showed his range in films like "Torrid Zone", "A Lion Is In the Streets", "The Strawberry Blonde", "Man of A Thousand Faces", and "Yankee Doodle Dandy" (his only Oscar-winning performance) just to name a few.

Below are my top 5 Cagney films. If you ask me to pick my top 5 a week from now, the list would be liable to change... that's the strength of his body of work.

1. White Heat (1949)- As outlaw Arthur "Cody" Jarrett, Cagney played the most multi-dimensional gangster role of his career. Although Cody Jarrett was a cold-blooded killer, his devotion to his mother made him oddly likable. Also, "White Heat" has one of the best movie endings ever!

2. Come Fill the Cup (1951)- He plays a reformed alcoholic newspaperman who helps a fellow boozer kick the habit. It's a shame that this one doesn't show up on TV much these days.

3. Yankee Doodle Dandy (1941)- Seeing this for the first time back in the mid 80s was a revelation. I have never been accused of being a flag waver, nor will I probably ever be. However, even I can't help but get caught up in Cagney's exuberant performance as patriotic song and dance man George M. Cohan.

4. Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye (1950)- If you think he was nasty as Cody Jarrett, Cagney is even more so as ruthless prison escapee/criminal Ralph Cotter.

5. Mister Roberts (1955)- As the cruel ambitious Capt. Morton, his confrontations with nemesis Mister Doug Roberts (Henry Fonda) are priceless.

The month-long salute to James Cagney starts tonight at 8 pm EST with his screen debut, the 1930 film "Sinner's Holiday". This will be followed by a movie of his that I have never seen, the 1931 gangster drama "Public Enemy". For the list of Cagney films that TCM will be showing throughout the month, click here. For information such as airdates and background details on the film, you can click on the movie's title.